Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Hank Steinbrenner: Comedy Gold

I don't know if we've had a post about newish Yankee boss Hank Steinbrenner, so here you go. I have had more than one fleeting thought that I wish that Hank stays healthy and strong for decades to come because, frankly, he puts out some of the most entertaining quotes almost daily. And I mean comically entertaining, not batshit crazy Ozzie Guillen entertaining.

Here's his take on the aftermath of Yankees ace Chien-Ming Wang's freak running-the-basepaths injury:

“My only message is simple,” Steinbrenner said in Tampa, Fla. “The National League needs to join the 21st century. They need to grow up and join the 21st century.”

Steinbrenner said he was angry and added: “I’ve got my pitchers running the bases, and one of them gets hurt. He’s going to be out. I don’t like that, and it’s about time they address it. That was a rule from the 1800s.”
Right. Major League Baseball players are athletes, correct? Hanky wants us to believe that Wang is incapable of running 180 feet without getting injured.

To quote Steve Czaban: Whaaaaaaaa?

You see, it's not the manager's fault that you're 5.5 games out of first; it's not the players' fault, either. It's not even the general manager's fault. No, it's the National League's fault. Stupid non-designated hitter league! Morons! (Ed. note: The DH wasn't born until 1973, when the American League voted it into existence.)

Steinbrenner went on to say that "[p]itchers have enough to do without having to do that.” That's like saying that you have a hard time walking and chewing gum at the same time, so instead you have to have a designated gum chewer.

Thanks, Hanky. Please keep the quips, anecdotes and grumbled sentences coming for years to come! I can't wait to who you'll blame when one of your players gets injured sliding into second base--the antiquated base designs, perhaps? The archaic sliding rules?

Newsday: Hank: NL is to Blame

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